motivation Posts - Born Fitness

How to Overcome Lost Motivation

Adam Bornstein — Mon, 17 May 2021 15:35:18 +0000

If you want to have more motivation, it’s important that you stop thinking of motivation in the way you’ve been taught.

When you don’t feel like doing something — especially something you haven’t tried or succeeded at before — you might say, “I don’t feel motivated.”

To get going, maybe you read quotes, listen to music, or watch an inspirational moving hoping to find your spark.

But, here’s the problem: boosting motivation doesn’t work that way.

We think motivation leads to action, when — in reality — taking action increases motivation.

We think motivation leads to action, when — in reality — taking action increases motivation.

If it seems like a backward process, well, we would agree. It almost seems unfair that you need to dive into something even if you don’t have the mental support and energy. But, that’s how it works.

While we didn’t design the human body, we can help you work with it to ensure that if motivation is low — or hasn’t even been created because you’re trying something new — that you can still set yourself up for success.

What is Motivation?

Motivation comes from the Latin word movere, which means “to move.” So, in theory, it makes sense that motivation helps you go places in life.

But, if you want to feel motivated, you need to move (or, more appropriately, take action) first and then the motivation comes.

Neuroscientists have studied motivation and found that if your brain can understand your challenges, goals, and hurdles, then you’re more likely to have the type of mental energy needed to achieve your goals.

It’d be great to have lots of motivation, but that’s not the default mode for many new tasks. When you try something new or want to achieve a goal, a part of your brain (your right prefrontal cortex) lights up that creates doubt and disbelief. Your brain is capable of helping you take on the world, but unfamiliarity can lessen your drive.

If you want more motivation, you need to tap into the left prefrontal cortex, which increases mental energy and focus. This other side is fueled by hope, inspiration, and a belief you can succeed.

What separates drive (left side) vs. dive (right side)?

Your brain needs to understand the actions it’ll take to achieve the goal, and it needs to feel realistic.

If you can accept this concept, you will have the motivation needed to succeed with many diet and fitness plans.

Why You Have Low Motivation For Diet and Fitness

Many diet and fitness plans are a trap. One that is designed for you to start and stop with limited success. We help clients achieve every goal from fat loss to muscle gain, and we see a common pattern that we work to undo. The pattern usually falls into two categories: :

Option 1: You want to start a plan and maybe buy a book or diet program. It’s possible you join a gym. But, you never really start or gain momentum. It’s frustrating from the start and you blame yourself.

Option 2: You start a plan and feel excited. You get new workout clothes, buy healthy food, and dive in with extreme compliance. You likely see some initial success too. Eventually (usually around the 4-week mark), you’ve suddenly lost motivation, almost as if it was sucked from your body. Going to the gym is harder. Eating healthy is no longer empowering; instead, it now feels stressful.

In both options, you end up in a similar position. The pressure starts getting to you. You sneak in desserts or snacks that are not part of the plan. Piece-by-piece, you start making decisions that you know are less than ideal, and — as a result — you give up on the vision of what you want to achieve.

So, why is it such a likely outcome when your desire to change is so strong?

Unlike most diet books, I’m not going to suggest detox, tell you to buy a supplement, or recommend “one change that will fix everything.“

Sometimes the problem is the plan itself, whether a faulty 4-week fix or a diet plan not designed for your body.

The bigger issue is you’re missing a basic concept that allows you to succeed.

Motivation is real, but relying on it is likely to lead to frustration and failure.

Why You Lose Motivation

There are two primary reasons that make it hard to rely on motivation. Instead of thinking of motivation as a jumpstart or a first step, think of it as a refuel.

Motivation is much more likely to keep you going and help you reach your goals rather than help you get started. Luckily, getting started doesn’t mean crushing a month’s worth of workouts or eating all the superfoods. It’s much easier but requires you to rethink your typical approach.

Your brain is amazing, but if you want to make it work for you, it’s helpful to know how it works.

As we mentioned, action increases motivation. Your brain is wired to increase motivation for the things we’re confident about, have tried, and understand. The habits we build create feedback loops that make it easier to repeat them. The habits we haven’t built are harder. So, you need to think about how you can make it easier to build a habit before you just jump in and begin a new plan.

The motivation will come…if you give yourself the right tools.

There’s another important reason why it’s hard to rely on motivation when you’re beginning a program. The area of your brain that controls motivation and willpower is the same part of your brain that also handles your day-to-day tasks, short-term memory, and focus. It’s more overworked than your Instagram feed.

Take a minute and think about everything you have to manage on a daily basis. And now, imagine that same overworked employee also has the responsibility of dragging your butt to the gym, eating the right foods, and preventing you from half a dozen old fashions at the end of the day.

If you really want to transform your body, the most important plan starts not with your body or meal plan, but instead an approach that will strengthen your mind.

The Science of Increasing Motivation (And Powering Body Transformation)

For many years, scientists tried to figure out how to increase motivation. Turns out, you don’t increase it directly. Instead, you make it easier for your brain to feel motivated.

That is accomplished with intention and commitment—two acts that turn your goals into a clear framework that your brain can get excited about. If you can train your mind to understand your goals (and what you’ll do to accomplish them), you can trigger motivation.

It’s the difference between visualizing a goal in a way that your left prefrontal cortex lights up and gives you the power to persevere and succeed, or having your right prefrontal cortex shut you down.

This might seem like a joke, but the facts are undeniable: there are countless studies showing how making a commitment—and preferably writing down your intentions in specific details—make it much more likely that you’ll not only stay on task but also achieve your goals.

It’s behavioral psychology 101, and, while it’s not as sexy as meal plans and new workouts, if you make commitments first, then those plans will become more effective.

Research from the British Journal of Health Psychology suggests why this gets the job done better than “just starting.” Scientists focused on helping people become more consistent with workouts. In the experiment, one group tracked their exercise [the control group], and another group tracked exercise but also tried to increase motivation [the motivation group] by reading about how exercise prevents disease. The idea here was that your brain could better understand why your goal was so important.

A third group [the intention group] did the same thing as the motivation group, but they also had to specify their intentions in the following way:

During the next week, I will partake in at least 20 minutes of vigorous exercise on [DAY] at [TIME OF DAY] at/in [PLACE].

The results? “Compliance” was considered exercising 1 time per week. In the control and motivation group, about 35 percent of participants exercised, at least, once per week.

As for the intention group, they had an astounding 91% compliance rate.

Other research, such as work done in Norway, found that those that formulate a plan for their diet eat healthier.

How To Boost Motivation (And Never Run Out)

If you want to increase your motivation, there are several steps you can take. Researchers from Australia found that moving slowly helps you achieve your goals faster. Instead of trying to master multiple habits, it’s more effective to take a step-by-step approach, such as building one habit at a time. This helps reduce cognitive load, which means your brain can both learn a habit and increase motivation.

In simple English: when your brain has less to process, it makes it easier for you to eat more vegetables or consistently find your way to the gym.

When you create big tasks (I’ll lose 20 pounds), your brain relies on precedent. So, unless you’ve succeeded at this goal before, then there’s a chance your brain will remind you on a subconscious level of past failures, and that can trigger learned helplessness. Fail enough and you come to expect failure.

Instead, if you can focus on attainable small goals, find ways to make it clear why they are important, and set intentions, then you’ve created an environment for good habits, less stress, and more motivation.

You still have to work hard, put in the effort, and stay consistent. But, when you make your goal simple, clear, and easy to follow, you reinforce a process that makes success a more likely option.

It might seem basic or even ridiculous. But, in no time, you won’t worry about lost motivation. Training your brain for success will build a mindset that will guide you to success.

Why You Gain Weight on Diets (and the Simple Fix That Will Keep Off the Pounds)

Winning the War on Hunger: Practical Solutions to Overeating

How Often Should I Change Reps?

Adam Bornstein

Adam Bornstein is a New York Times bestselling author and the author of You Can’t Screw This Up. He is the founder of Born Fitness, and the co-founder of Arnold’s Pump Club (with Arnold Schwarzenegger) and Pen Name Consulting. An award-winning writer and editor, Bornstein was previously the Chief Nutrition Officer for Ladder, the Fitness and Nutrition editor for Men’s Health, Editorial Director at LIVESTRONG.com, and a columnist for SHAPE, Men’s Fitness, and Muscle & Fitness. He’s also a nutrition and fitness advisor for LeBron James, Cindy Crawford, Lindsey Vonn, and Arnold Schwarzenegger. According to The Huffington Post, Bornstein is “one of the most inspiring sources in all of health and fitness.” His work has been featured in dozens of publications, including The New York Times, Fast Company, ESPN, and GQ, and he’s appeared on Good Morning America, The Today Show, and E! News.

The post How to Overcome Lost Motivation appeared first on Born Fitness.

8 Lessons From Arnold Schwarzenegger For Personal Success

Adam Bornstein — Wed, 10 Mar 2021 18:11:06 +0000

“I never believed I was average, and that alone is a big reason I wasn’t.” -Arnold Schwarzenegger

Perspective influences outcomes. The idea that your mindset plays an important role in your future reality is maybe one of the most underrated elements of human change.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is the ultimate example of someone who built a vision for what he wanted to achieve, created opportunities, and surpassed expectations throughout his life.

While it’s easier said than done, success leaves clues. Specifically, the way Arnold approaches situations, obstacles, and challenges is a masterclass in mental preparation, visualization, maximum effort, and mastery.

“No matter what, I had to prove to myself that I’m extraordinary. There is no normal,” Schwarzenegger told me during an exclusive interview.

The mind is a powerful thing, and Schwarzenegger has leveraged an unbreakable mindset to seemingly create a competitive advantage over the universe. As someone who started with nothing when he immigrated from Austria to the United States, his belief in himself and his hard work has made the world apparently bend to his will — and not the other way around.

What allowed a former Mr. Universe and Olympia to then become a Hollywood movie star and, ultimately, also become the Governor of California?

It wasn’t a motivational talk or a secret shortcut. It was a mindset that has powered everything Arnold has done.

“Always think of yourself as special. And think, ‘I’m going to prove to myself and the rest of the world that I can do it.’”

Even at 72 years old, the Austrian bodybuilder-turned actor-turned governor-turned activist continues to believe there’s more to accomplish — and it’s likely the main reason he continues to break the rules of aging and add more achievements to his resume.

If you’re looking to change your mindset, and learn how to make a vision a reality, here are 8 motivational lessons from Arnold Schwarzenegger on building mental toughness, eliminating the fear of failure, and developing unbreakable habits.

Lesson 1: Remove Your Excuses

“There’s an advantage of doing things automatically,” says Schwarzenegger. “I have a routine where you don’t have to think much — if at all. [Routines] are the foundation of a house.”

Schwarzenegger has built his life on habits and routines that have made him a creature of habit and efficiency.

Whether it’s his workouts he used to win Mr. Olympia and Mr. Universe — delts and arms one day, chest and back and calves another day, abs every day, and an extra 30 minutes of cardiovascular exercise at night — or checking email and catching up on news, Arnold has built-in expectations for his day.

“Add as many of those routine things as possible because you do them without ever thinking about them. This is your daily schedule. Like breathing.”

While this isn’t earth-shattering, his mindset towards creating habits isn’t what you’d expect.

Whereas you might consider it difficult to build certain habits, that’s where Arnold believes most people go wrong. You can’t label something as “difficult.”

If you think about change as challenging, it’s the first step towards making it harder to adopt change.

“People should realize that I don’t have sympathy for ‘difficult.’ There are a lot of things in life that are difficult,” adds Schwarzenegger.

“If you want to build routines, you need to change your expectations. Are you going to back off every time something is difficult?”

“Or, are you going to be the person who looks at something that is difficult — or the most difficult — and say, ‘I’m going to go and do it and prove it to myself.’ That’s how you build habits.”

“Don’t ask should or shouldn’t I? You just do it.”

Lesson 2: Create Energy By Saving Energy

It’s easy to think of a routine as a way to be more efficient with your days. But, for Arnold, it’s so much more than that.

Routines are designed to require less mental energy and focus so you can have more energy to give to the non-routine aspects of your day. This is why making certain daily experiences is so important. If you’re going to have the energy to tackle the new challenges, you can’t be drained by everyday expectations.

To help you understand the importance of automated experiences, Arnold shared his experiences in politics as Governor of California.

“When I was Governor, I had fixed funds on what you could spend on certain programs like education. It’s a fixed expenditure. Same for healthcare and prisons.”

“I had something like only 8 percent of discretionary funds. There’s very little wiggle room. But, knowing what is automatic and knowing what is not help you focus,” says Arnold.

Arnold recommends creating as many fixed moments in your day as possible. Then, you have fewer times where you’ll need to dig deep, be creative, and come up with custom solutions. This is good because then you’ll have more energy to dedicate, which means you’ll be more likely to succeed.

Less variation means more focus. The more you can focus on fewer things, the more likely you’re able to create a bigger impact.

Lesson 3: Add Value With Effort

I asked Arnold about something most people don’t know about him, and he shared his love of art and painting. But, that’s not what stood out to me (even though I was impressed by his painting). It was how he thinks of his time spent creating art for others.

“Today, it’s easy to go to a store and buy a gift or go to the flower shop and get flowers. You used to go out and pick flowers and put them in a vase. It’s all flowers. But, my mother was in heaven that we made an effort to go out and make the gift.”

Arnold understands that output isn’t the only measure of success. Your effort is one of the most important parts of the equation.

“You must try to make an effort in everything you do, especially things for others. When you find pottery and paint on that, they know you spent hours on that. It makes a difference. It takes effort and people really like that.”

If you’re working on something, it’s easy to think about finishing the job. It’s something else to think about how you can take a task and put in more effort in a way that makes the final outcome something better or more meaningful, and in turn, that task has a positive impact on your own life.

Lesson 4: Success Follows the Unconventional

According to Arnold, more than 50 years ago, no one worked out in the morning. Gyms didn’t open until 10 am, so the entire structure of the day was based on rules that, as it turns out, didn’t exist for a good reason.

Arnold explained that people used to believe you were weaker in the morning. It wasn’t until he lived with his idol, Reg Park, when he finally decided to break the rules.

Reg forced him to train early in the morning. Arnold recalls squatting 500 pounds at 5:30 am, and how it changed everything for him.

The shift helped him remove limiting beliefs about his body. This, in turn, helped him understand that most limitations are self-conceived.

“If you think you can’t do something, you won’t,” says Arnold. “It’s a mindset that starts with ‘don’t be afraid.'”

“If you try to do something different, you might be surprised how much what you thought was a limitation wasn’t real.”

Lesson 5: Turn Visualization into Realization

Arnold opened up about one of the scariest moments of his life:

“Arnold, you’ve been asleep 16 hours. Something went wrong with this non-invasive procedure…you had internal bleeding, and in order to have you not die, we had to open you up.”

In the most powerful moment of our discussion, Arnold shared how his “routine” heart surgery took an unexpected turn and he was faced with a difficult comeback prior to playing The Terminator (once again) in Terminator: Dark Fate.

You might wonder how Arnold responded to such overwhelming news, and his immediate wasn’t what you might think.

“I wake up, I see what’s happening, I’m hearing the doctors, and I’ll I can think is, ‘Wait a minute, in three-and-a-half months, I’m supposed to be in Budapest to shoot Terminator 6. But, they are saying it takes 6 months to recover.’”

While it might seem like Arnold wasn’t thinking about the big picture and overall health, it was — in fact — the opposite. He was visualizing where he needed to be as a way to return to health.

“I always look for motivation. If you have no motivation, then it’s hard to get going under those circumstances. You’re down and you have a major setback. And the vision is what can bring you back.”

“If you have no goal, you have nothing. You have to know where to go. You need a vision.”

Lesson 6: Focus on Small Wins (They Add Up)

Once you have your vision, then you need to put in the reps. This is exactly what Arnold, whom many consider the greatest bodybuilder of all-time, had to do in order to recover from his heart surgery.

“I asked the doctors, ‘When can I get up?’ And the doctor says 3 to 4 days. People don’t die from the procedure; they die from pneumonia and lungs filling with fluid,” recalls Arnold.

“I’m going to be up tomorrow and I’m going to be walking. Get me a walker. And that’s what I did. I went for walks, would lie back down, rest, and then get back up for another walk. I was a fanatic. I built up to 2-hour walks. Then, I traded the walker for a cane.”

Instead of focusing on the end goal, Arnold focused on mini-milestones. Get out of bed. Use the walker. Go down the hall. Go for an hour. Ditch the walker for a cane. Believe in yourself.

The micro-goals were all steps on the way to recovery. And, it worked…just like it has throughout his life.

Within 6 days Arnold was out of the hospital. Just 3 weeks later he was working out with light weights. And, as he promised, three-and-a-half months later, he was on set for Terminator 6. Ready to work like hell.

“The director said, ‘I can’t believe you had open-heart surgery three-and-a-half months ago,’” says Schwarzenegger.

“We all have setbacks, but, if you have a very clear vision and a clear goal, then you put in the reps, you can come back.”

Lesson 7: Find Your “On Switch”

Despite his success, Arnold isn’t immune to having down moments or aging. But, it’s his ability to adapt and be self-aware that allows him to keep on thriving.

“When I hit 50, I realized I was not able to come back as quickly at 2 am for filming after 2 hours of sleep. So I said, ‘I will never sleep again at night when I’m filming.’ But, I needed something to give me a spark.”

That spark was chess.

“The more chess I played, the more alert I was and able to come to the set fully charged because my mind was ready from all the chess. I remembered the lines 100% and the physical work felt 100%.”

“You have to figure out what it takes to be on. When you have a setback or feel sluggish or mentally tired, you must find a way to recharge.”

Lesson 8: Eliminate Distractions

In the 1970s, Arnold found himself overwhelmed with his bodybuilding career, acting, buying real estate, and building construction.

“A lot of things came together at once. I was overloaded,” recalls Schwarzenegger.

At that point, Arnold turned to meditation, something he has discussed in the past. For a year, he would meditate 20 minutes in the morning and another 20 minutes at night. Whereas many might find meditation beneficial for its ability to calm and destress, Arnold found another invaluable benefit that continues to help him today.

“[After meditating] all of a sudden, I could focus on one thing. I could do real estate and not be thinking about bodybuilding When training, I wasn’t thinking about acting. I got really focused and learned how to focus, and it made me better at everything I did.”

“Knowing how to focus on one thing at a time has made me better at everything I did.”

Build Arnold-Like Confidence

Arnold’s mindset is built on something we can all possess: confidence.

That starts by removing your fear of failure. And visualizing what you can become and not what might go wrong.

Arnold’s confidence allowed him to take chances and push himself to heights no one could’ve ever imagined — except maybe himself.

And, that’s the secret. If you believe something will happen, block out the distraction, prove the naysayers wrong, and focus on habits that will allow you to tackle your big goals – then anything is possible. But, it all starts with your belief.

“Prove to [the world] that there are extraordinary things that can happen because that’s when they can.”

Adam Bornstein

The post 8 Lessons From Arnold Schwarzenegger For Personal Success appeared first on Born Fitness.

What No One Tells You To Look For In A Healthy Diet

Adam Bornstein — Wed, 29 Jul 2020 17:55:24 +0000

Each week, we review feedback from coaching clients and readers of the site and our emails. One of the most common frustrations is figuring out what to eat, specifically knowing what to look for in a healthy diet.

The reason for the struggle is that it’s not clear where to begin to fix the problem. It’s not like eating one food suddenly improves your diet.

In fact, you’re likely already aware of what stands in your way. We hear three common barriers:

Time (or lack thereof)
Confusion (not being sure of what to do or believe)
Motivation

A lack of time is a struggle for everyone. But, trying to make time becomes easier if you can eliminate confusion and increases motivation.

And, despite being different issues, they are both deeply connected.

What Prevents Good Diets From Working

In the book Switch: How to Change Things When Change is Hard, authors Chip and Dan Heath explain that your lack of clarity undercuts both.

In their book, the Heath Brothers were speaking about business and answering the question, “Why won’t your employees do what you want?”

The answer is “Because they don’t know exactly what that is, or how to do it.”

That’s true for your health, too.

Let’s say you set out to make a big change in your life, such as losing 10, 20, or even 100 pounds. It feels exciting but also overwhelming. After all, you think to yourself, “I need to adjust my diet, exercise, and even my sleep. Where do I start?”

Maybe you decide to start by eating better, but what exactly does that mean?

Or, you say: “I’m going to work out more.” But, in the back of your mind, you wonder, “How much is ‘more’? Will it be enough to make a difference? And do I really have the time for that?”

These are the sorts of questions that can kill your motivation before you even begin. You aren’t sure what to do next, so you do nothing. Or, maybe you take a step or two, but then feel you aren’t getting results. Soon, the entire plan starts falling apart.

When you aren’t confident that a change is going to make a difference, it’s hard to truly commit to that change.

4 Habits That Make Any Diet More Effective

Before you can gain confidence in your plan, it helps to have more clarity in your plan.

The Heath Brothers explain that when you know exactly what changes to make — and you see them make a difference — you want to keep doing them.

That’s essentially the same idea behind habit-based coaching. You take one step, then another, and another.

The changes needed for weight loss start with something that seems simple. Painfully simple. Perhaps, even boring.

If you’re looking to build a healthy diet, it doesn’t start with extreme restrictions, blood tests, or need to measure every ounce of food. It begins with habits that help put you in control of your diet, no matter your food preferences or lifestyle.

This includes time-tested techniques such as:

Eating slowly
Chewing more
Getting enough vegetables and fruit (yes, fruit. Fruits are not evil. Neither are carbs.)
Sleeping 7-8 hours a night

All those habits are a big part of an effective diet plan, but you rarely hear them discussed.

Eating slowly and chewing more helps ensure that the right signals are sent to your brain to indicate when you’re full.

Fruits and vegetables keep you fuller for longer, are loaded with valuable nutrients, and have been proven to help you eat less of the things you love but know you need to limit (hello brownie sundae).

And, sleep is likely the most-underrated diet secret because lack of sleep does everything from make you hungry to increase your cravings for salty and sweet foods.

All of that knowledge is great, but following those simple habits can feel like a chore. So, how can you “make yourself” do it?

How to Stay Motivated (Even When The Scale Goes Up)

Motivation is tricky because it feels as if it’s just a decision, but it’s actually far more complex. Motivation is actually part-psychology and part-biology, according to Eleanor Simpson, associate professor of clinical neurobiology at Columbia University.

Beneath every choice you make, your brain does a complex cost-benefit analysis. The calculation takes into account your surroundings, your history, and how you are feeling at that very moment.

That math is more likely to come out in your favor if you’re already seeing results. Think about it: when you’re down a pound or two from last week, or you feel a little stronger in your next workout, it’s easier to keep pushing and believe you’re on the right track.

But, what if you’re just getting started, feeling stuck, or you’re not seeing any changes? This is when you lose faith and motivation, and even the best plan falls apart.

That’s when you need to realize two things:

Remember that weight fluctuation (spikes, dips, and plateaus) are part of the process. Within any given week, if you weigh yourself daily, you’ll see days where your weight goes up. This is normal. It could be a result of how you slept, whether you had more salt or carbs than usual, stress levels, and several other reasons. But, assuming you’re staying on track with your plan, the weekly and monthly trend should be headed down, which is exactly what matters.
To help you get through those days when you see a spike or you “don’t feel like it,” make sure you’ve connected your goals to a larger mission. Or, you need to remind yourself what you’re doing, why you’re doing it, and that it’s time to get things done and make your goals a reality, even if it feels like it’s not going to happen.

How to Stick To Your Diet

If you’re looking for a simple technique to help keep yourself accountable, you might want to borrow a tactic that comes from General Stanley McChrystal, a retired four-star general who once led the U.S.’s Joint Special Operations Command, which oversees units like the Navy SEALs and Army Rangers.

According to motivation writer Eric Barker, McChrystal always tells his soldiers:

Here’s what I’m asking you to do.
Here’s why it’s important.
Here’s why I know you can do it.
Think about what you’ve done together before.
Now let’s go and do it.

Now imagine this as a conversation between you and your body. You say:

I’m asking you to go for a walk three times per week.
It’s important because we’re trying to shed 20 pounds and walking burns calories.
I know you can do it because you walk from your parking spot to the office every morning.
You’ve dedicated hours at a time to those TPS reports at work, so you have the attention span to do this.
Let’s go and get moving.

Try that for any change you make this year. And if it doesn’t work, try listening to the Rocky theme before you do it.

That may sound ridiculous, but it’s effective. Barker explains that, when all else fails, energetic music can improve your performance. (And it doesn’t have to be Rocky. If you prefer hip hop, R&B or even metal, do your thing.) That’s not his opinion, it’s science.

Interested In A Custom Nutrition Plan?

At Born Fitness, we know every individual is unique. There’s no one-size-fits-all nutrition plan. Our team can develop a plan around your lifestyle to help you reach your goals.

If you’re looking for more personalization and hands-on support, our online coaching program may be right for you. Every client is assigned two coaches — one for nutrition and one for fitness. Find out more here.

The Beginner’s Guide To Fat Loss

A New Approach To Fat Loss Nutrition

Eating At Night Does Not Make You Fat

Adam Bornstein

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Note To Self: F*ck The Haters

Adam Bornstein — Tue, 12 May 2020 17:50:37 +0000

Let’s be honest: the idea of “getting better” isn’t always what it seems.

The obvious approach is that improvement is measured by growth. And growth is measured by accomplishing more than what was done prior. And “accomplishment” inherently implies a comparison to a prior situation or time.

But, what if the idea of growth wasn’t just measured by how hard you pushed or the progress you could quantify?

What if getting better was defined by finding joy, calmness, or clarity at the moment? Those traits require improvement of self-awareness over productivity; of self-care over competitiveness.

Different times call for different measurements of success.

When the going gets tough, you need to find a way to persevere.

But, perseverance doesn’t have one definition. The only way to get better isn’t through.

Anyone that says otherwise is either too stubborn to see the error of their own ways, bound to burn out, or too selfish to recognize that one person’s fuel is another person’s fire.

These are hard times. COVID-19 has ravaged us all in different ways, some more than others. But, all of us are affected and impacted.

Nothing is normal and no one knows what to expect. But, there’s a bigger lesson within. Normal is always relative to time and situation.

A global pandemic makes us all stop and think. But, the ability to pause, adjust expectations, and find joy in stillness will pay off now and during any time of trouble or challenge.

It’s Time To Play Chess

When it comes to your health and fitness, I will always encourage you to do as much as you can to be healthy. It’s why I’ve been inspired by all of the fit pros trying to make more workouts available, just as we’ve done.

Unfortunately, there’s a dark side to the adaptable mentality. Doing what you can is not the same as “getting better at all costs.”

I’ve also seen too much shaming of people’s time or struggles. Just because we’re on lockdown doesn’t mean you need to get in the best shape of your life. Or, eat healthier than ever.

This mindset doesn’t only apply during times of lockdown. When life throws you obstacles, sometimes it’s better to play chess than checkers.

Movements become more subtle. You take more time. It might not even look like you’re moving forward, but — when done right — you’re setting yourself up to win in the end.

Personal growth can occur in many ways, and it’s easy to assume that physical fitness becomes easier when there’s more time. But, that’s just a fallacy.

More importantly, buying into that mentality can be damaging.

A big part of being healthy is not only being kind to your body but also kind to your mind and heart.

This is the reality:

You’re going to miss workouts.

And have crappy sessions.

You’ll snack more.

You might not even recognize your diet.

Maybe you’re sleeping less because of stress.

Maybe you’re sleeping more because of stress.

It will all feel different — and that’s OK.

Whatever the situation, part of getting through all of this is to not set unrealistic expectations.

I’m as low-stress a person as you’ll find, but that has all changed. Each day is a new challenge of juggling my kids being at home, making adjustments for my businesses, watching friends becoming sick, seeing people die, experiencing friends losing their jobs, and someone managing the emotional weight of it all.

And, given all of that, I know that I have not been impacted anywhere as much as millions of others, and it’s still difficult for me. The point: hardship is hardship. And when you’re in it, you must recognize and respect it. For yourself and others.

There is No Wrong Move

Right now, more than ever, it’s important to control what you can control.

Spend your time focusing on doing the little things that fill you up, removing what drains you (as much as possible), and staying healthy and keeping your head above water.

Together, as people, we need to support one another because none of us know what the future holds.

But, I do know this: the love, kindness, and patience you give to yourself and others will make you stronger through the pandemic and when we create our new normal moving forward.

I spoke with Arnold Schwarzenegger. The Arnold Schwarzenegger. The same guy who used to train for 5-6 hours per day. Even he says it’s important to adjust and celebrate the small victories that you might not have even acknowledged in prior times.

When he had open-heart surgery, he didn’t start with the same expectations that propelled every aspect of his success. He had a bigger goal but began by adapting and tackling reality.

That meant building up the strength to use a walker. Then taking 100 steps. Followed by walking unassisted. Each “milestone” was a reason to be proud and moved him closer to where he could do more. Remember, this was coming from a guy who used to squat more than 500 pounds, and now a walker was a success. It wasn’t “normal” but it was necessary.

It might feel like you’re changing your expectations, but really you’re building momentum.

Better times are coming, but that doesn’t mean right now isn’t hard.

When you can’t see clearly, it’s essential to focus on the next step, knowing that each one will take you out of the fog and towards a time and place where things are better.

The healthiest thing you can do is learn to celebrate the small wins, whether it’s the walk you take, the vegetable you eat, the friend you call, or even the deep breath and reminder that “this will pass.”

Fuck the haters that tell you otherwise.

Sometimes, it’s not about good or bad decisions. It’s about action vs. inaction, and any action is a win.

Remember, we don’t build strength to lift heavier weights. We build strength to help us through moments like this.

As people, we evolve and adapt to situations. That is how we survive and thrive.

Your fitness goals will be there whether you can tackle them today, tomorrow, or 3 months from now.

Create energy where you can.

Conserve energy when you feel drained.

And, remember to stay strong and keep smiling.

When you do, those steps will accumulate, you’ll see more clearly, the pieces will be in place, and then….checkmate.

Adam Bornstein

The post Note To Self: F*ck The Haters appeared first on Born Fitness.

Bad Fitness: Why You Don’t See Results From Your Workouts

Adam Bornstein — Tue, 10 Oct 2017 22:45:31 +0000

33.

60.

92.

On the surface, the numbers mean nothing. They could be a lottery number, a gym locker combination, or the estimated age when all men mature. But if you look closer, these numbers are proof that fitness programs aren’t working the way they should. Or maybe more accurately, bad fitness has become the norm.

Approximately 33 percent of the population is now obese or overweight, and that number is projected to climb
More than 60 percent of people who visit gyms have trouble sticking with their plan consistently for more than three months.
Up to 92 percent of people fail at their fitness resolutions by the end of the year.

Some might find these numbers depressing. The reality is, the numbers—while disconcerting—are a sign of hope and improvement. Because while most experts continue to spend so much time stressing the search for the perfect exercise program or diet—research is finally uncovering why so many people struggle to get in shape.

And the reason is simple: an important variable is missing that significantly influences whether you see the type of results you want.

Good health and fitness books or good diet programs work because they provide information that has been proven to achieve a particular goal, whether it’s burning fat, building muscle, becoming more athletic, or just boosting overall health.

Whether a diet and training program works is not why so my people fail. Many diets work. Many types of exercise burn calories. But certain programs are effective for individuals because each person is able to crack the code and learn how to change behavior.

It’s time to flip the script on why certain people are fit and others struggle to fit into their favorite pair of jeans. It’s the secret in the fitness world that few people address because most never grasp why some people succeed on the same plan where others fail.

Beyond the calories in versus calories out equation, finding the perfect workout or number of sets or reps, the real breakdowns in body transformation don’t occur in the muscles or fat cells—they happen in your head.

Whether you realize it or not, your success is determined by your ability to adhere to a number of behavioral changes that make it easier for you to experience success on any type of program.

The two most common explanations for why fitness programs don’t work are:

1) The workout (and/or diet) was no good and full of nonsense

2) Your body sucks. Your genetics are awful. Everyone can lose weight and you can’t.

The reality is, the second reason—while valid (genetics do play a big role)—is not a reason for your lack of success. Anyone can change and transform. Weight loss and muscle gain are not restricted to the genetically blessed.

The list of why programs don’t work is missing two essential elements that make it complete:

3) You didn’t follow the program, weren’t compliant, and constantly made adjustments

4) The program was delivered in a way that gave you no option but failure.

It’s this fourth element that most people overlook and never even consider, which is why so many are frustrated because it is probably the most common reason for frustration and a lack of progress.

Unless you inherently love exercise and eating good foods, shifting to new habits takes a lot of mental energy. And if you don’t take the right approach, your brain can literally prevent you from making the changes you desperately want.

Instead of blaming yourself, you can arm yourself with some basic knowledge that will make sure you mind is strong enough to carry your body to its new and improved look.

Bad Fitness 101: Don’t Rely on Willpower…

The first rule of willpower is doing everything possible to not rely on it. Willpower is a real thing, and it can be the reason why you head to the gym and eat broccoli instead of lay on the couch and eat ice cream, but it’s also the reason so many people have trouble adapting to healthy behaviors that feel foreign.

You see, you have much less control over your behavior than you’d want to believe. That’s because stress and anxiety—emotions that are inevitable—can wreck havoc on even the strongest intent, and make it difficult for you stay focused and push yourself to stay consistent with new behaviors.

Which is why it’s important when taking on a new plan to be aware of the ways that your willpower might make it difficult for you to experience success. Instead of thinking, “I must avoid all of the candy in my pantry,” you need to throw out all the food you know you have trouble avoiding and replace it with the stuff you want to eat.

If you’ve noticed that you can’t make it to the gym consistently, hire a trainer and make a special request that they text you an hour before your session.

Willpower can be faulty, so building systems that guide behavior can ensure that when willpower breaks down failure is not the only option. The more structure and rigidity to the systems you build, the easier it is to program your behavior.

If you feel that you need to walk more, you can purposely park your car 15 minutes away from work. Sure it’s inconvenient, but it will get the job done, right?

All too often we over-rely on the belief that creating change will be easy. Instead, anticipate that it will be hard and simplify your job by making it easy for you to adhere to your new behaviors. After a while, you will change as a person, and you won’t need the systems any more.

…But Creating More Willpower Will Help (Yes, it’s possible)

The most frustrating thing about willpower is that we legitimately have limited amounts available. The area of your brain that controls your willpower is located in your prefrontal cortex. You might remember this from biology as the area directly behind your forehead.

It’s the same part of your brain that helps you with all your day-to-day tasks, everything from your short term memory (What did my wife tell me to buy at the store?), figuring out some simple tasks, and even staying focused.

The point is, the pre-fontal cortex is busy at all times. So whenever you take on a new behavior—especially one that is as big as getting in shape, exercising, and eating better—it’s like having a massive project dropped in your lap and being told everyone else in the office is too busy to help.

The result is that desired actions—if new—can be very (very) hard to execute. In fact, it’s more than your brain can handle, meaning you default to old or undesirable behaviors.

Here’s how manipulative your brain can be. In a well-known study at Stanford, two groups were given a number to remember. One group needed to remember a two-digit sequence, whereas the other needed to remember 7 digits (Both short-term memory tasks). Then the groups went for a walk. At the end of their walk, they were offered an option of snacks: Fruit or chocolate cake. (This type of dilemma might sound familiar.)

What happened? Those who had to remember the 7-digit number were two times more likely to dig into the cake instead of opt for the fruit.

Researchers refer to this as “cognitive load.” The more space you’re taking up in the prefontal cortex, the harder it is to make certain decisions. That’s why you need to train yourself and prepare accordingly so that you have enough willpower to take on new tasks.

This is one of the reasons why resolutions are such a flawed concept. If you’re trying to change 10 behaviors at the same time, it’s nearly impossible for you to succeed. Your brain won’t have it, and, as a result, you’ll be more likely to find yourself in December eating cake—and not because you’re celebrating your new body.

Instead of listing off many goals or taking on too many projects, it’s best to focus on one big effort and then break that down into habits. Researchers from Australia found that taking a step-by-step approach, such as building one habit at a time helps reduce cognitive load.

So rather than saying “I need to lose 10 pounds” it’s best to program simple behaviors that will help make this possible. This might be, “I will have an accountability team to make sure I go to the gym.” The habit is simple—building a team—rather than something more complex such as promising that you’ll exercise for 60 minutes five times per week.

The lesson: Be aware that your willpower is the most overworked employee in your brain. Make the job easier and you’ll see your habits change along with your body.

5 Ways to Boost Willpower

In order to make sure you create more willpower and don’t sabotage your efforts, here are five things you need to consider when trying to change your body, take on a new diet or fitness program, or accept a new behavior.

Create Hope

We all want to believe that we can achieve our fitness goals, but all too often “false hope syndrome” makes the process harder than it needs to be. You need to set realistic expectations of who you are, what you are capable of achieving, and want processes you need to set up to help you be successful. This goes back to building systems.

If you know that you fall victim to cravings, don’t tell yourself those days are over and that you can completely control yourself. Odds are, you’re lying to yourself and these positive intentions—while seemingly good—can be harmful. That’s because the moment you slip up you’ll not only revert back to old behaviors (not terrible when it happens once in a while—hey, we all screw up!) but more importantly it can crush your self-esteem. And once that happens, willpower becomes overrun and you fall off the wagon.

Therefore, it’s important that you start out confident, but also be realistic with what will be easy and what will be hard. Make a list. Separate it into two goals (easy and hard), and for everything that’s hard, plan certain systems that will help ensure that you’re not putting too much pressure on yourself.

Think Small (But Still Dream Big)

If you’re serious about your fitness goals, you need to determine what other areas of your life should be prioritized less. Go in open-minded and realize that making these changes will be tough; if they weren’t, you wouldn’t be in this position in the first place. So make sure you have the energy to take on the task and be prepared for the hard days. You can simplify this process by:

Creating goals that matter to you. This will make it easier to fight for them.
Setting up a plan
Creating Milestones
Trying new ways of living

All four of these elements have something in common: you’re creating new thought patterns. When brain scientists have looked at MRI’s they’ve found that our minds work off of old memories. It’s like a taking a particular route to work. After a while, it becomes you routine. But when it comes to behavior, oftentimes you simply try to tell yourself, “Don’t go that way!” That’s a recipe for failure. You need to find a new route. Don’t try to “not to do something;” that just strengthens a pre-existing behavior. Instead, create a new line of thinking, build a new neural pathway, and take that route enough times until it becomes your new habit.

Set specific Goals

This is a good lesson for anything in life: When you set goals, make them specific and tiny. You want to make it as easy as possible to succeed. We all are susceptible to a psychological concept called learned helplessness; fail enough and you come to expect failure. This is the foundation of bad fitness. And yet, all too often goals are set that increase the likelihood of failure. If you make your goals almost too easy to not fail, you’re on the right track. This builds positive reinforcement. And in no time, a series of small successes will have you feeling good and making more changes.

Set up An Accountability System

Speaking of positive feedback, having a team—whether it’s friends, family, a trainer, or workout partner—pays huge dividends for any fitness goal you’re trying to accomplish. In fact, research from the University of Chicago suggests that your likelihood of success is directly related to accountability and support. The ongoing lesson: don’t convince yourself you need to go at this alone. Build a team that can help you succeed. And the more that team is either invested in your goals—or are willing to be a part of your journey—the more likely you’ll succeed.

Create Incentives

If all else fails, bad fitness can be offset by building an incentive system that hacks your behavioral patterns and forces change. Research has shown that rewarding behaviors—especially with a monetary value—can help reinforce actions (such as going to the gym) that lead to long-term change. While it might be hard to find someone to pay you to exercise, you can invest your own money (in a trainer or gym) that might help make you less risk aversive. But if gym attendance shows you anything it’s that belonging to a gym is not reason enough to get in shape.

Your Move

“What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself.” –Abraham Maslow

Now that you’re aware of your brain’s role in the fitness plans, it’s up to you to execute. Build your own structure and systems to help improve the likelihood of success. Or find an option that considers all of those factors.

Whether it’s online coaching or any other proven tactic, you must start with awareness and then move to planning and action. Create a structure for psychological support. Doing so will change your mind, and soon after your body will follow.

Lose Fat…The Realistic Way

A weight loss plan doesn’t have to be a world of false promises and hype.

Now you can join a proven weight loss program with a personalized component of support and accountability with personalized online coaching.

Here you’ll learn how to eat, the type of exercise needed, and the actual plans to point you in the right direction.

How to Defy Genetics and Build Muscle at Any Age

Is Intermittent Fasting Right for You?

Want to Burn More Calories? Add This to Your Fat Loss Plan

Adam Bornstein

The post Bad Fitness: Why You Don’t See Results From Your Workouts appeared first on Born Fitness.

Forget Motivation. Find Your Pulse.

Adam Bornstein — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 13:48:11 +0000

This might be tough for you to read and you might not like everything I have to say. But if you accept this advice as a genuine solution, you will why you can succeed where so many others fail.

Goal setting is the health equivalent of pressing the refresh button on your life.

No matter what you did in the past, setting new goals is an opportunity to change everything. The process is as basic as it is motivating: Learn from the past and plan for a better future.

Have hope. Be an optimist. And believe that anything is possible.

It’s a safe and effective approach that allows you to reinvent yourself, set new standards, and become the person you want to be.

Unfortunately, if success was that easy and motivation was a given, you wouldn’t repeatedly set the same goals year after year.

As you might know, willpower is a limited reserve. So really on it is far from a surefire way to accomplish way you want.

So what really separates the successful from the unsuccessful? And why do so many people constantly need to reset goals hoping for the best only to repeat the same failures?

The goal-failure-success continuum really boils down to one simple factor, and making an adjustment to your approach could be the difference between achievement and failure.

The dirty little secret about goals is not complex.

Those who succeed are unwilling to quit. They want to taste success more than those who don’t.

More importantly, those who succeed understand realistic expectations and timelines of progress and change.

According to research published in the Journal of the International Society of Sports Nutritionists, a more effective approach for long term fat loss is a plan that allows you to lose “only” about .5 to 1 percent of your body weight per week.

For muscle gains, if you factor out “rapid beginner changes” you might be looking at a maximum (in the most perfect of scenarios) of 4 to 8 pounds of muscle gain in 12 weeks, and even less the more experience you have.

This isn’t meant to be depressing. Instead, it should be just the opposite. It will allow you to set realistic goals that won’t drive you insane.

Why Progress is Blind

We all have the desire to be better. In fact, that’s what motivates most people to set goals in the first place.

But after working with thousands of people and hearing countless stories—both of successes and failures—the most common reason for success is the relentless drive to succeed.

This is not a blame-game or a lack of respect for whatever hurdles stand in your way. I’ve failed at plenty of my goals too.

This is a reality check that everyone needs to accept, yet few ever mention.

Changing your body, losing weight, gaining muscle, quitting smoking—every goal you desire will be difficult to achieve.

At some point, you’re going to hit a bump in the road, confronted with a challenge, and begin to doubt your ability to make real, lasting change.

Many view this as a bad thing. In reality, this is the inevitable situation you must confront if you want to have long-term success.

Reaching this point is not the problem; it’s how you react after it occurs.

Pulse Moments: The Gateway to Greatness

When situations become difficult and you anticipate trouble on the horizon, do not ignore your frustration. That’s the first step towards failure.

Instead, acknowledge your anger and fear. Channel your frustration and ask yourself one simple question: How badly do I want this?

When you want to succeed as bad as you want to breathe that’s when you’ll achieve your goals.

This isn’t about six-pack dreams, running a marathon, or building bigger biceps. Those are all great goals that are achievable by anyone. But it’s not the goal itself that matters; it’s your relentless mindset in its pursuit.

I don’t care how far your journey might appear. You can make a change. And if you have any doubts, read the stories of those who are just like you.

I’m inspired by these people because they do the “impossible.” And now it’s our job to eliminate doubt and apathy so that you can join in on the success.

This is a gut-check. Or as I call them: Pulse Moments.

Check your pulse and determine if you’re ready for your own challenge.

Are you willing to scratch, and claw and fight for your health? Are you willing to push harder, make yourself a little uncomfortable, and make the adjustments you need to succeed?

Change is hard, and I understand every ounce of hurt you feel when it seems like you can’t lose weight, you can’t eliminate pain, or you can’t become the version of yourself that you so desperately desire.

Change starts by taking the first step, looking in the mirror, and saying, “I want to be better.”

But that’s just the beginning. You need to remind yourself that this will be a battle. And that the battle should be fun.

Make no mistake about it: Becoming healthy will make you smile more, laugh more, and feel better than you could ever imagine.

It’s worth every drop of effort you put into it. But making the transition from your current situation to the one you want takes time and includes struggles. It will be difficult, it will inevitably frustrate you, and you have to expect what’s waiting on your journey.

Approach your goals with eyes wide open.

Have hope. Be an optimist. And believe that anything is possible. And then tell yourself that when you get knocked down, you will pick yourself back up.

Every. Single. Time.

Do it for your family. Do it for your friends. Do it for the people you love. And most importantly: Do it for you.

Once you achieve that mindset, the rest is comparatively easy.

Your job should be limited to one single focus: Take action and don’t stop until you achieve your goals.

You can be the change.

But change doesn’t start with making a list of goals, finding a great workouts, or finally settling on a diet that you can follow.

It begins with a hard look in the mirror and a determination that your health is worth fighting for.

It’s time to make it count. Take the first step, don’t accept failure as an option, and you’ll never again doubt that you can uncover your best.

Adam Bornstein

The post Forget Motivation. Find Your Pulse. appeared first on Born Fitness.

The Fitness Divide

Adam Bornstein — Thu, 16 Oct 2014 18:08:23 +0000

I almost punched someone in the gym.

And in some ways I’m upset I didn’t. Only doing so would have only made one of the more recent fitness trends even worse.

I was in the gym for a weekend lift. The gym was a little busier than usual, but typical for the time of day. The floor was crawling with all types of movements.

Burpees, bench presses, and butt shaking all going on at the same place. (And yes, someone was actually shaking their butt doing some sort of awesome dance workout).

But there was this one guy who stood out from the rest. He was wearing a beanie, half of his head covered the other stands delicately hanging out. Lean and muscular, there was nothing that should have made him pop in the room, except that he was repeatedly interacting with these two apparent beginners.

I switched off my headphones and listened in as the beanie mocked a complete stranger for not being stronger. The beanie then lifted up his shirt, showed off his 6-pack to overweight man, and says, “This is how it’s supposed to look in here.”

I’ve seen a lot of dumb things in the gym.

I’ve contributed to the stupidity in many ways. One time back in 2009 I wasn’t paying attention with moving weight plates. Naturally, I picked up a 45-pound plate and smashed it into my mouth. (Yeah, this was not my best moment.) I cracked my two front teeth and had slammed the weights so hard that the metal of the plates became one with my teeth. One could say it was my run at having grillz.

We’ve all seen some dumb stuff in the gym. And oftentimes it’s fun to make jokes about it.

But there’s a difference between making jokes and creating a culture that makes beginners feel like they don’t belong or that they are judged for every move they make.

It’s easy to say they need a thicker skin. Don’t be a baby. But we’re also not in their shoes and can’t tell them how to feel.

The gym can be an intimidating place, especially for those who are not comfortable with their bodies or gym culture. Some people will say, “If you think other people are judging you then you have bigger problems.” Then again, some of the most popular brands of fitness have worked to address this issue.

Look no farther than CrossFit. Say what you want about programming and injuries (and there’s plenty to discuss and criticize), but they have a created a culture where people feel welcome. Or why do you think P90X was so popular for so many? Working out at home means not working out at the gym and avoiding that environment.

We oftentimes try to understand why more people aren’t in better shape and can’t make their way to the gym.

We call people lazy.

Say they lack motivation.

Insist that there’s not enough time.

All of these might be true or might contribute to the problem or be a realistic barrier.

But every year many people decide to start fresh and still find themselves pushed away. Instead of making fun, mocking, or insulting people who are doing the same stupid stuff we all did at some point, we need to be more encouraging so that they can learn and become comfortable.

This is serious. Too many people feel the gym is not for them. Are some people too sensitive? No doubt. But for many people that threat is real and overwhelming.

Here’s the truth: Once people stop stressing about looking stupid or having people laughing at them, they are free to work hard, kick some ass, and make changes. But the judgmental, condescending attitude needs to end.

We don’t need to make the gym more welcoming for those that love to lift and spend lots of time in the gym. We do need to acknowledge their style of training and let them do their thing, whether it’s going HAM on some heavy weights or pushing a sled. At the same time, there are many more who are new and feel uncomfortable, but want this–a healthy life, fitness and exercise–to be part of their life.

All of us need to make sure we’re on the same page and create a culture where exercise–no matter what your activity of preference or level of expertise–is treated like a good thing and encouraged.

Fitness isn’t just for me or you. It includes the heavy lifters, the Crossfitters, the P90xers and the cardio crew. Sure, I have my opinion on what is best and what is more effective.

But I’d rather have someone find their place doing something active than settling for a sedentary life and health problems.

Fitness is for us all. Let’s draw the line, open the doors to all, and let everyone choose the option that feels best for them. That’s when fitness will live.

I encourage you all to open the doors. That’s what #BeTheChange is all about. Spread the word and let’s change the game.

Adam Bornstein

The post The Fitness Divide appeared first on Born Fitness.

4 Ways to Become Better

Adam Bornstein — Wed, 01 Jan 2014 18:58:01 +0000

Remember when resolutions were considered a good thing? It wasn’t that long ago when vowing to become better, finding the areas of your life that needed improvement, and creating a sense of optimism was met with acceptance.

Not just “New Year’s resolutions,” but any commitment to change. It wasn’t that long ago when vowing to become better, finding the areas of your life that needed improvement, and creating a sense of optimism was met with acceptance.

But there’s a shift occurring. Somewhere along the way, those who use January 1 as “National Goal Setting Day” were criticized for a variety of reasons. Instead of encouraging people for their efforts, the sentiment became, “You shouldn’t need a day to motivate you to become better. You should be inspired every day.”

To that, I have a simple response: Who cares?

Who cares what motivates someone to change—as long as they are motivated. What difference does it make if you set your goals on January 1, July 22^nd, or every third Wednesday of the month? If you like setting resolutions and it makes you feel better, then do it.

The real issue isn’t about a desire to change — it’s why you oftentimes fall short of your goals.

Every year millions set resolutions and fail. Or sign up for personal training and can’t lose weight. Many others dream of a better job and end up stuck in the same position. Write the script however you want, but many are unfulfilled and looking for an explanation.

Out of frustration, we try to create reasons for the failure.

Maybe resolutions are the problem. If so many people do them, maybe they should be eliminated.

I’m not for or against resolutions. I’m a supporter of doing whatever works for you.

Finding that sweet spot is less about putting labels on a solution, and much more about understanding the right questions to ask so that you can figure out the answers you need. Or in this case, understanding how your approach to change is oftentimes flawed.

Fear Factor

There’s a reason you read articles like the one you see here.

And it’s not self-improvement.

It’s curiosity. And maybe more accurately fear.

It’s not that you’re fearful that you’re not becoming better; you’re worried that there’s something you’re not doing that you should be.

People fail not because they lack the desire or ability to succeed. But oftentimes they suffer from what is called “ego depletion.” In other words: mental fatigue. I’ve written before about the importance of willpower and how it’s a real thing.

Our struggles are tied to a lack of control. And that control results from an overwhelming number of urges in life. Each one drains your willpower a little more and leaves you with little to get the job done.

So your job is not so much “identify the goal” (such as lose weight), but find ways to become more honest with yourself and narrow the focus of what you really need to work on.

Go Slow to Go Fast

There are probably one thousand ways to write a “Make your life better” article. You can start with a quote. You can create a list. You can even build a flow chart or an infographic to visually inspire.

I’ve tried many of these before. Some with success. Others without. And most—like all things in life—with mixed reviews.

But maybe the most direct way to do it is to show it from my own eyes.

Every year I work with dozens of people one-on-one to help them reshape their lives and gain more control. They let me into their lives. Make me their family member. Their brother. Their friend. Their trainer and therapist and bartender. Whatever it takes.

I listen. And learn. And watch them change me.

The more you work with people the more you learn exactly how to help them. Sometimes they need information, other times they need inspiration (as in they need to believe that the info/lesson applies to them), and the other category is direction.

This is where we need more help. Less time saying “Do exactly this” and more time saying, “Find how this applies to your life.”

You don’t need me to tell you that you must love your life. You know that. And you don’t need me to tell you how to live your life.

Your life is your own. My life is mine. And neither is better than the other. Each is distinct and handcrafted. So instead of telling you what to do, which only adds more mental fatigue and sucks up the willpower, it’s more important to give you tools and options that you can use to simplify your approach.

Tomorrow starts today

I truly believe that the people who are able to write their own script are the ones that learn the most—in both successes and failures—and can become better, stronger, and create the life they want.

Only you can carry your torch, but sometimes you need a match to see the paths a little more clearly.

With that in mind, here are 5 options of what you can do to be the change. It doesn’t matter if it’s to start a new year or at any time you feel you need a kick-start. Search for these answers and use these questions to narrow what is missing in your life. Then apply in small pieces. You don’t have to make these changes all at once. Focus and take an aggressive approach that puts you in control. Once that happens, then the changes are more likely to occur.

**Life Changer #1: Do something you used to love**

People talk all the time about how much more children smile than adults. It’s natural because as a child you don’t have any stress. But as children, we also care less about what others think and simply do things because they are enjoyable.

That simplicity of doing something just because is an asset found in some of the happiest people in the world.

Stanford psychologist found that the perception of control over enjoyable activities in life is important to fulfillment. In other words: You should be doing things you like because you like them. There doesn’t have to be a reason or a purpose, and you shouldn’t have to give an excuse.

So think about what you used to enjoy and explore the reasons why you stopped it. Many times there was no good reason at all, and it might be a great time to turn back the clock as you move forward.

Life Changer #2: Ask, “What have I wanted to do that I keep avoiding?”

Most people’s lives are filled with routines. Wake up, make meals for yourself and/or your children, go to work, maybe talk with some friends, eat dinner, sleep, and repeat.

There’s nothing wrong with these patterns but they limit your ability to find missing pieces. Sometimes we become so focused on what we are doing wrong that we fail to consider we might be doing everything right—but that certain elements are missing that could make us happier.

Not only does this remove some pressure of searching for things that are wrong, it will open you up to new experiences that you may have never realized were central to your happiness.

Life Changer #3: Reassess…and then try again

For the past 6 years, I’ve been missing something that I love: teaching. So after years of saying, “I’ll do it next year” I finally jumped back into education by teaching an online course for a university.

It was great being able to teach again—but it did it not go according to plan. Not even close. There were many reasons why I didn’t succeed, and the easy answer could have been, “I suck.” (I’m sure many of my students might think that’s the case)

But I read all the bad reviews. Talked with my supervisor about what I could have done better. I rewatched every lecture (they were online and recorded), and made a list of everything I would improve and could have done better.

My approach was focused: No excuses. No finger pointing. And most importantly no quitting just because things didn’t go the way I had hoped.

If I’ve said it once I’ve said it 100 times: Failure is oftentimes a part of success. Sometimes, it might even be necessary for success. But the great ones don’t let their struggles tear them done—they use them to build back stronger.

Next time you face a moment where you didn’t meet your goals, don’t chalk it up to a loss.

In life, there is always another quarter if you choose to stay in the game. And if you make the right adjustments, odds are you will win.

Life Changer #4: Ask a Friend for Criticism

This is something I’ve learned from writing books. When you’re so close to a project (such as your own life) oftentimes it’s hard to see what’s missing and the areas that need the most improvement. Just like training a muscle, we oftentimes do more of what we love and avoid what we really need.

In an ideal world, your friends will call you out when you need help. But sometimes your “problems” are not anything serious. So instead of waiting for someone to say something, you should take action and ask for a review. It’s like what you’d get in your job, but this comes from someone you definitely respect and trust.

Don’t take this as a bad thing, and don’t get angry at your friend for what they might say.

Remember: criticism is not a way to make you feel bad. It is a guide to help you become better.

Life Change #5: Give More

A close friend of mine was recently feeling frustrated with his job because he was working in an environment that generated negativity. My friend watches as those at the top of the corporate ladder seemed to break all the laws of being a good person. He was left with two options: Embrace a “nice guys finish last” mentality or try and rage against the machine.

He chose door #2 and decided to be good and do well in spite of the negativity.

It’s a choice we’re oftentimes forced to face: We are oftentimes more aware of the bad in the world (even if it’s the minority), that it’s easy to wonder, “Will doing good really make a difference?”

It does. In a big way. Just like the commercials of paying it forward, we are a society of observational learners. When we see people do “bad” and get ahead it reinforces a belief that we can do the same. But the opposite is also true. When you do good, other people see it. Even if they don’t mention it, they see it and it inspires them to do the same.

How does giving more make your life better? Giving is the ultimate test of passion. When you do something with no expectation in return, you easily find what fuels you. (And conversely, what doesn’t.) You also learn about your ability to communicate, lead, and follow tasks that might be outside of your comfort zone.

All of these are valuable but oftentimes they are learned in a pressure situation, like your job. When you can build capabilities in a less stressful situation (such as when you’re volunteering your time), you remove many of those barriers and grow as a person in ways you would never expect. Many of my best lessons in leadership came not from running a company but while tutoring inner-city children during my spare time.

Not to mention, if we all gave more—whether to charity, your friends or family, or a complete stranger—we would inspire others to do the same. You can give money, offer help, or just ask someone how they are doing and if you can help out. If more people decided to make this a priority, it would create an army of people all united by one cause: to help others.

It’s so simple but it’s effective. Give to one. And that one could be the spark that not only pushes you but also helps many.

Adam Bornstein

The post 4 Ways to Become Better appeared first on Born Fitness.

Beyond Training: Mastering Motivation

Adam Bornstein — Wed, 25 Sep 2013 20:25:11 +0000

I’m about share something that only my wife knows. I call it “how to increase motivation.” But really, it’s “how to live life.” Every single morning I wake up at the crack of dawn and start the first 15 minutes of my day the same way.

Five minutes are spent making a list of everything I’m thankful for—but none can be material objects. This is not a list of what I’ve earned; it’s about the things that have unlimited value.

The next 10 minutes are dedicated to a different list—one that identifies how I will take charge, knock down doors, and bite into life with a passion that was greater than the previous day.

The goal is to just push yourself. Because when you push yourself, good things happen.

One is a gratitude list. The other is about goals and lighting a fire in my belly that will fuel me throughout the day. It’s my pregame speech. Mickey yelling at me to work harder and not be a bum. Pacino telling me about Any Given Sunday. And I do it every day.

I realize that some people aren’t wired like me, but I don’t think my habits are unique. They are fueled and inspired by something else—my time in the gym. While my business revolves around the fitness industry and includes training, most of what I do happens outside the gym.

And yet, so much of what I learn in the gym and accomplish in life is made possible by my willingness to challenge myself to become better every time I train. I wrote in Man 2.0: Engineering the Alpha that “success breeds success.” We are creatures of reinforcement. Find something you can succeed at, and then use that help you believe that you can succeed at other tasks. That’s the real reason I enjoy working out.

It’s not about the six-pack abs or looking good in the mirror. It’s about another form of confidence: The type you have in yourself to take on life, accomplish your goals, and feel good.

If this is something you’re seeking, take the next two minutes and read this incredible article by Jim Smith. The first time I read it I was amazed. It takes you in one direction and then completely surprises you, yet leaves you feeling inspired and excited to take on a new challenge. If you’re looking for more energy or just some instant motivation, let Smitty’s words be your charge. -Born

Beyond Training

By Jim Smith

I’ve always loved training.

Even from the very first time I picked up a weight as a scrawny 15 year old wrestler, I knew it was something I would do for the rest of my life.

I loved how training made me feel and I loved finding out how hard I could really push myself. I never knew then that training would help me find my calling as a coach or that I would be helping others reach their goals in the gym and on the field, but that is exactly what happened.

Training has become a way of life for me over the last 25 years.

Being the Best?

Over the years, I’ve developed the mindset that whatever you do, you should try to do your very best and try to be the very best.

But it hasn’t always been an easy road.

One funny story that I’ve never told is about the very first time I benched pressed. It was at the high school and my wrestling team was working out. They started with quarters on the bar – or 95 lbs – and I got crushed! I was so confused. I grew up on a farm and I threw 50-75 lb hay bales around every summer and I thought I was strong; even though I weighed in at a whopping 95 lbs soaking wet.

It was at that point that I vowed to start training on a regular basis, and I haven’t stopped in all of these years.

One of the biggest problems I had early on was always comparing myself to what others were lifting. This caused me to go too heavy on lifts where my form wasn’t great in the first place. Yes, I got injured, but because I was young, I bounced back quickly.

It took time but I slowly learned that I didn’t have to beat anyone else in the gym, I just had to conquer myself. Training changed my mindset. It stopped being about getting through the workout that was on a piece of paper or comparing myself to others, and became a challenge that I had to face every time I stepped into the gym. And no matter what the challenge, I wasn’t going to break.

I had to smash down the self-imposed limitations in my mind around what I was capable of doing and training did that for me. The weights became inconsequential and my effort became my focus.

Become Unbeatable

Hitting a max effort rep on the bench isn’t about the actual rep. It is about the doubt creeps into your mind when you unrack the bar, refocusing your mind, intensifying your will, harnessing your strength and going down with the weight and grinding the bar back to lockout with everything you have.

That is training.

That is life.

Resolving in your mind that you will give nothing but your absolute best in the face of any struggle. Throwing down a last set of squats and saying f*ck it and dropping the weight 50% and crushing a set of 50 reps to finish off. Going outside after heavy deadlifts and pushing the prowler around the building on a hot day when the pavement feels like glue; until blood shoots out of your eyes. Hitting dumbbell bench until your chest explodes, not for 3 sets of 8 reps, but for 100 reps in the fewest sets possible.

I no longer try and keep up with anyone and their numbers. I use others who are stronger than me to inspire (not compare myself against) me to push harder in my own training. Thinking of Jim Wendler hitting squats or John Meadows crushing his insane workouts humble me to go further; further in my mind.

Because I know the harder I push myself in training, the easier and simpler life becomes. I can brush off everyday obstacles and keep driving forward.

That is the mindset of a successful person and of a champion. No matter the task, no matter the struggle, they will overcome through relentlessness and consistency.

At some point in your life you really have to find out what you’re made of and training might also be that path for you.

I did a SEALFIT challenge last year and it was one of the proudest moments I’ve ever had in my life. I trained for six months prior to the event and gave it everything I had.

Did I dominate the challenge?

No, it crushed me.

But it taught me the mind is powerful and we have to develop it every day. And your mind will be there when your body gives up. Every next step, next breath, next rep – can become a small victory. And when you add up all of those small victories, you achieve greatness. As long as you never stop moving, you will get to the end.

SEALFIT became another victory that I could use when life smacked me in the face and I’ve used this strength to go further in my mind, my training and my life.

Finding Yourself

Getting outside of the typical workout schemes can help you push the limits in your training. A few ways that I’ve found that work best for me is including different high-itensity training protocols into my workouts. Training that includes heavy dropsets, rest-pause training, slow eccentrics, and high volume sets, can take your strength, muscle mass, and mindset to new levels.

It really doesn’t matter which one you use. The goal is to just push yourself. Because when you push yourself, good things happen.

The idea is to find yourself and create or rebuild the person who you’ve been hiding away. You will be free to be yourself and be able to show up for those who really count on you in a big way. Society has a way of lulling people into complacency and giving them feelings of “I’m not good enough” or hopelessness.

Screw that!

Never feel sorry for yourself and never let others give you your self-worth. Your life can change in an instant and it all starts with changing your mindset. You can change who you are today in an instant when you decide ‘enough is enough.’

Motivation and More

Looking for the answers to your fitness questions? Sign up for the Born Fitness newsletter. Free information, motivation, and other cool words that end with “tion” sent to you without any of the confusion or double talk. Join the #BeTheChange movement. Sign up below.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Jim is a proud Dad, strength coach, and entrepreneur. Co-author of the best selling Athletic Development Training system and co-founder of the CPPS certification for coaches, Jim has been recognized as one of the ‘most innovative coaches’ in the fitness industry. Jim is regularly featured in Men’s Health, Men’s Fitness, and Muscle & Fitness.

Adam Bornstein

The post Beyond Training: Mastering Motivation appeared first on Born Fitness.

Finding Happiness

Adam Bornstein — Thu, 07 Mar 2013 01:16:58 +0000

I have an important confession to make that might change the way you look at me. But I don’t care. This needs to be shared.

I used to wonder what it was like to go to a school party. I’d have those thoughts all the time because I’ve never been to one.

When I was in high school I never went to homecoming. Or the prom. Hell, I never went to any organized dance that didn’t include the words “Bar” and “Mitzvah” smashed together.

If you ask anyone from my high school, they might tell you they don’t remember me. In fact, I’ve seen people that I grew up with who have no recollection of my existence. Apparently, I just didn’t make much of an impact. Maybe it wasn’t my time, or maybe I was a late bloomer.

Whatever the explanation, I knew that the world around me—and the way others perceived me—wasn’t how I felt about myself inside. And yet, in many ways, I let the perception of others shape the world I lived in. And that, in turn, led me to question what I could do, what I could become, and what I would achieve.

Fast forward many years, and I was named one of the “50 Hottest Trainers,” according to SHAPE Magazine. It’s awesome to receive any type of praise, but it made me think about perception. Not the perception I have of myself or even what people from high school would think of me now. That doesn’t matter to me. I thought about your perception of me, and the path I took to get here.

You see, most of us believe that some people are just born successful…or good looking…or lucky and fortunate. We believe that this is a society of have’s- and have-nots. While it’s true that some might have an easier path, it doesn’t mean that you can’t create the type of existence you want.

Throughout high school, I never dated anyone. So it would have been easy to consider a loner, introvert, or even ugly. In my early and mid 20s, I didn’t make much money, and you could have considered me unsuccessful or without direction. And for much of my life, I struggled to understand why my own perception of myself differed from the one the world created for me.

I’m sharing this now not because I want you to feel bad for me. And it’s not because I want you to applaud me for turning things around. I’m telling you my story because it’s important for you to understand the power you have over your own life.

Why We Fail (And Why it’s Not a Bad Thing)

I’ve said this before in another story I wrote for Greatist, but I truly believe that my success and happiness is a byproduct of my failures. It wasn’t until I understood that my perceptions mattered more than the perceptions of others that I was able to take control of my life and start determining what I could achieve, and the difference I could make in this world.

The truth is, I’ve failed in every aspect of my life. I’ve been viewed as a loner, a loser, or someone that just wasn’t meant to succeed. The key word here is “viewed.” I never believed that, but I did allow it to prevent me from taking steps I should have taken or wanted to take.

At some point, I realized that the bumps and bruises might never end. So I could either accept that fate and what others thought of me, or start taking control, stop making excuses, and pushing towards what I wanted—no matter what.

If you take a brief look back, you’d see that I’ve fallen or been knocked down repeatedly:

When I started lifting weights, I could barely bench press the bar. One time, I was even crushed underneath a whopping 65 pounds.
For years I tried to gain muscle and become stronger—only to become skinnier and seemingly weaker.
In relationships, I’ve failed many times. In fact, I was even engaged once before and watched that turn into one of the most miserable experiences of my life.
When I wanted to become a journalist, I applied to 27 different jobs and received 27 rejections for 27 difference publications.
When I applied for grad school, a certain program (and Pac 12 rival) told me, “You are an academic. You will never be able to write for the general population.”
Once accepted into grad school I wanted to teach. The university told me no.
Then, when in a grad school, I tried to get a job at the local paper. I was rejected…again.
Even when I had some success and got a job at a major publication, I had multiple book ideas rejected and my superiors questioned if I had the talent to succeed.

This all led to a fundamental decision that changed my life.

The Happiness “F-word”

So what happened? I said, “F-it.”

No, not that “F.” I decided to flip it. Flip the perception. Flip the expectations. And flip the negativity and make it positive. The world can be a cold and dark place, but you can warm everything up if you choose to be happy, smile, and be the change. (Yeah, I lived in Boulder but I promise this isn’t some hippy mumbo-jumbo. It’s a truth too many people fail to accept.)

By flipping my perception I was able to:

Work on my bench press to the point that I could press 315 pounds for reps.
Transform from 130 pounds of skinny fat, to a solid 175 pounds. I never looked like a model, but I was happy with the work I put in and the results in delivered.
Trade my failed engagement for a woman who appreciated me for me. And I couldn’t be happier or more grateful.
Earn that teaching job. I flew to the school, and met with every professor possible to prove that I could teach. And I did.
Fight for my first steady journalism gig. But I had to grind it out and work for free to have a chance. It all started with the rejection, and deciding to attend high school football games, write stories without assignments, and then force my way into an editor’s office and prove that I could do the job I didn’t have. It was aggressive, but it worked.
Take the criticism of every editor and turn it inward; I focused on what I could improve, I sought out more people to learn from, and I decided to always be a student and focus on what I could do better. The result was much less complaining and a lot more success.

Finding Happiness, Motivation, and Success

I’m a firm believer that your destiny is not pre-determined. Your destiny is what you make of it. Whether you believe it or not, you choose what you become. You choose if hurdles stand in your way. And you can build the type of life you want.

Finding happiness is about setting out a course, having a vision, and never stopping. Detours occur. Goals may change. But the only “wrong” step is taking no steps at all.

Don’t take this as an overly optimistic view of the world. I know some hurdles might seem insurmountable. And that not every single goal can always be achieved. But most people don’t realize what is possible because they stop when one door is closed. Or they decide not to try when a wall seems too high or impossible to climb. We say, “I can’t have this.”

F-it. You can have it.

Your destiny is dependent on being true to yourself. It’s about looking deep within, deciding what you want to be, and then pursuing that goal as if nothing else in the world matters. Because you know what—nothing else does.

Your job is to be happy. So imagine what that happiness looks like, and then go after it.

What do you want to be? What change do you want to make? What do you want to accomplish?

These are the questions you should ask and the ends that you should pursue.

Whether you actually accomplish all of them is not the point. It might be your primary goal, but success and happiness are more likely to be achieved by pursuing the version of the life you want—and not the life that others create or typecast for you.

Our society is one of preconceived expectations. We put people in boxes, judge others, make perceptions, and then almost force people into a universe not of their own choice.

F-that.

Flip it. Don’t let the world define who you are and what you can become. I wanted more control over my life, so I started with my body. Once I discovered that I could control how I look and feel, then I found happiness in my ability to “be me.”

The more I was able to “be me,” the happier I became. The more I was able to shape my world, my destiny, and help people around me, the more I understood that success is not about reacting to everything. It’s not about seeing what others say or do and responding to it.

The world you want—one fueled by motivation and happiness—is for those that are proactive. For those that believe life has something better for them, and that goals and dreams can come true, as long as you don’t quit.

None of my goals ever had anything to do with being a “hot trainer.” It’s flattering, but I honestly couldn’t care less. And you know what? My goals didn’t include being a best-selling author, either. It all started with wanting to be fit, healthy and the best writer possible, while covering a topic I love. Everything else has been a result of following that dream and never losing sight of it, no matter what stood in my way.

Don’t believe what others say or think. Believe in what you can become. Believe in what you can do.

It will take you from a life of wondering to a life of living. And that might be the best party of all. Your invitation is waiting for you.

Taking the Next Step

If you want to know more about overcoming hurdles and improving your body, you can apply for a spot in my online coaching program where you work with me one-on-one to help you achieve your goals and find your happiness.

Adam Bornstein

The post Finding Happiness appeared first on Born Fitness.

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Life Changer #1: Do something you used to love

Life Changer #2: Ask, “What have I wanted to do that I keep avoiding?”

Life Changer #3: Reassess…and then try again

Life Changer #4: Ask a Friend for Criticism

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Why We Fail (And Why it’s Not a Bad Thing)

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**Life Changer #1: Do something you used to love**